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Stress free wedding planning – know your limits

 

Today’s stress free wedding planning feature could also be titled ‘You Don’t Have To Be Superwoman’ or even ‘Doing It All Can Get You Down’ and I imagine that gives you a pretty clear idea of what I’m going to be talking about today! When it comes to wedding planning, knowing your limits (and sticking to them!) is so incredibly important if you want an enjoyable and stress-free build up to the big day. Unless you genuinely have been born with super human abilities, do read this feature because I promise you, it’ll make you happier.

Now I’m not going to beat about the bush, there’s an awful lot of work when it comes to planning a wedding and bringing everything together can take months or even years. Not only that but we all have to find the time for all this extra work on top of our everyday lives. Frankly, you deserve a huge round of applause right now.

However, as much as you might love planning your wedding, you should never try and do it all. Firstly, unless you’re a professional event planner, taking on such a massive responsibility on your own is almost unfair. You run the risk of driving yourself into the ground and, horribly, arriving at your wedding day tired, fed-up, worn out and generally utterly disenchanted with all things wedding. None of these things are good and none of them need to happen.

 

Stress free wedding planning is about knowing your limit and not taking too much on

 

So, let’s start by repeating to ourselves that we’re not wedding planning robots and we are generally wonderful humans who can do many many of the things but not ALL the things because that’ impossible for anyone. There are no gallantry medals for the bride who hauls herself to her wedding having not slept for two nights because she was handcrafting a table plan and your marriage won’t be automatically happier because you’ve lavished hours and hours of your time on the wedding day. Now I’ve made my point, let’s look at what what you can do…

Start off by being realistic. If you’ve always run a mile from handicrafts, now isn’t the time to decide to make everything for your own wedding. By all means try one or two small and simple projects but don’t over commit yourself and give yourself plenty of time to enjoy what you are doing.

Plan your time carefully. Nothing makes you feel more overwhelmed than the sudden realisation that you’re running out of time. If you think a job is going to take an hour, give yourself one and half. This means that you can undertake the task without pressure, which in turn means you’re way more likely to enjoy yourself. If you end up with time to spare, great! Do something for you and enjoy the moment.

 

Some crafts are easier than others like this wedding sweet table, it's all about knowing your limits for stress free wedding planning

 

Also, don’t feel that you can’t ask for help. I’m sure that none of your closest friends and family would like to see you fraught or upset so if it’s all starting to get too much, ask for help before it does. Try and give helpers those simple but often time consuming tasks such as picking suits up from a hire company or delivering boxes of decorations to the venue in the days before the wedding.

In the whole ‘asking for help’ area, remember that there are professionals out there who do this wedding planning thing for a living and trust me, they can be simply brilliant. Lots of planners offer services that include help in the weeks before the big day or flexible packages where you can ask for assistance in just one or two areas. The UKAWP is a great place to look for reputable planners and, if you’re starting to feel out of control, a planner can be a lifesaver (this kind of last-minute expense is absolutely what your budget contingency is for – see last week’s feature on budgets!)  And in the coming months we will introduce you to Carmela Weddings, and you may have already met the awesome stylist Kate Cullen who was recently featured on our blog.

If you’re not working with a planner, make sure you’re organised. One simple sheet listing the dates when suppliers need to be paid, numbers need to be given to a venue and contact details for everyone involved will help you stay in control and you’ll know all the most important things at a glance. Also, if you’re asking others for help, having one go-to list for people to consult is really helpful.

 

Once you know your limits, ask friends and family to help in areas that you can't do

 

Lastly, be prepared to let a few things go. It’s far more important to all your guests that you’re happy and smiling at your wedding and if that means that the ribbons don’t get tied around napkins, so be it. Whilst you might know your plans in great detail, your guests don’t so if one or two relatively minor things aren’t in place, that’s fine. Your priority in all of this should be you, your own wellbeing and a happy wedding day that sets the scene for a fabulous marriage.

Until next time,

Amanda x

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